Jude Collins

Friday 5 June 2009

A tale of three ferrets


Two - no, three political dramas unfolding this weekend. In Britain, Gordon Brown is being savaged by his own party, who are shit-scared that they're going to go down with him at the next election and are hoping against hope that maybe, somehow, someone else will mean there'll be less Labour blood on the walls of the count centres wihen the time comes. Leading the charge is one James Purnell (I think) who is an ex- of Charlotte, Phoebe's friend from college. In the twenty-six counties, Brian Cowen is facing a similar fate, except there isn't as yet a heave against him from within his own party. Maybe because they're all paralysed with the terrible thought that the public seems to think Enda Kenny would be BETTER THAN HIM...You can't get into much deeper trouble than that. And here in the six counties, the count won't be held until Monday (the Sabbath intervenes, dontchaknow, and sure the Muslims and the Jews would be against counting of a Saturday, and on Friday sure TGIF and are going to the pub or what?) but the tallymen are saying that Bairbre de Brun is home and dry with 26-28%, Diane Dodds is somewhere around 20%, and the remaining three - Nicholson, Magennis and Allister - are ferrets in a bag fighting it out. UTV and the BBC, of course, are giving all the attention to the ferrets and none to the fact that Sinn Fein have made all Diane Dodds nightmares a reality ('a disaster for unionism') by topping the poll. The thing is, would old Alban Magennis winning a seat be good or bad for nationalism? After all, he does belong to the only avowedly post-nationalist party.

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